Teh Daily Squeak

Teh squeak c'est chic!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

 

Deb Frisch Sentencing 2009


'Deep Squeak' Attended Trial, Will Attend Sentencing!!

FRISCH FLUMMOXED DURING CROSS-X!!
HAYS VOLUNTEERS TO OVERSEE FRISCH'S PROBATION!!


Eugene (March 11)--New details have emerged in accounts
of Miss Debbie's pwning in court on March 4.

A tricksy source on teh ground, who we've dubbed "Deep
Squeak," was in court teh day Frisch was convicted of her
drunken pepper-spray attack on an acquaintance.


It has been learned:


*Frisch wore an "ugly-ass blue pants suit, two
sizes too small"
to teh trial....

*Frisch had failed...to sign a jury-waiver before
trial
....

*Frisch was jumpy at trial, furtively calling someone on
her cell-phone at every break....

*Debbie was pwned on teh stand...."If you felt threatened,
why didn't you just call 911?" she was asked. Teh obvious
question left Frisch "red-faced, stammering, and
looking stoopid"...

Eyewitness testimony at trial produced further nuances
of teh fateful night of November 2nd:


*Debbie was drowning her limp lobes in hard liquor...

*Frisch was
unable to find her car....When she found it,
she only drove 10 feet before accosted by teh po-po....

*Frisch attempted to
bite her victim...

PSYOPS SECRETARY VOLUNTEERS TO
OVERSEE DEB FRISCH PROBATION!!1

Gerbil Nation (March 11)--In a late-breaking development,
Kirk L. Hays has volunteered to function as Deb Frisch's PO for the
duration of her parole...

"I heard Lane County might be low on funds for probation officers,"
said Hays. "I'm ready, willing, and able to help law enforcement in
any way."

There are rumors that Frisch faces a 30 day jail sentence for her
violent attack on an acquaintance, for which she was convicted, last
Wednesday. Earlier, she'd turned down an offer to serve 5 years of
probation (and a 5 day jail term); so any sentence tomorrow is bound
to carry a long-term probation sentence.

A vague rumor by a trusted source has also caught our interest here
at Teh Squeak. "Expect some serious legal drama tomorrow," said
the source.

Teh source refused to elaborate further.


Comments:
*Frisch attempted to bite her victim...
Her victim should be damn glad her reactions were enough to avoid this. Aside from the assault aspect, I can't imagine what the medical torment would be to TREAT such a wound.

Good reporting, as always!
 
Splendid work yet again, BroTimmeh; I didn't realize Teh Squeak had a roving reporter at teh trial!1!!11!!

Was it Brit Hume?

(BTW - I wonder if Frisch has ever figured-out that you're not teh Tim from DHD who was her former student?)
 
Who will feed her dog?
Free JEB!
 
X:
Is that the same as rabies?
 
I wonder if the "drama" will include a white Bronco chase or an unfortunate lamppost.
 
Yes but think of the DNA she'd leave behind in either case, EB.

Ewwwww!
 
Yes but think of the DNA she'd leave behind in either case, EB.
No!
::shudder::

Rabies would be a plausible diagnosis, Eddiebear...
 
"I wonder if the 'drama' will include a white Bronco chase or an unfortunate lamppost."

Perhaps a grassy knoll or a farm near Plainfield, WI.

"Rabies would be a plausible diagnosis..."

There's also Lyme disease, distemper and/or worms.
 
There's also Lyme disease, distemper and/or worms.
Nah, even worms have their limits.
 
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